Because I'm still studying, the fact that Bell needs to go to school whether I'm done with college or not still exists, Bell is still my responsibility not my mom's. My problem now is where to get Bell's school fees.
I have to enroll her to a very good school that will make her ready for UPIS next school year. I'm keeping my fingers crossed until she gets into that school. In preparation for my dream school for Bell, I have to enroll her this school year 2010-2011 to a school near our house that is worthy of her time and skills.
Apparently, my mom is already crawling her way to finance me and my two siblings to finish school and I don't think she can still afford to shoulder Bell's needs as well. All our utility bills are soaring high but her wage is not.
I am so praying to God to help me with this thing. I don't know what to do or where to get Bell's needs but I have to work on something. I am now desperately seeking sponsorship for Bell's school fees. My baby is smart for her age and I don't want to waste that. I know any mom would do anything for her child, and I will too but what can I do. I cant push myself to work on something else that I know I have a very limited time only. I also have my own school dilemma going on too so I don't know. I really don't know.
Lord Jesus, please help us. I am seeking your grace to please help us get through this. Amen.
Friday, May 07, 2010
Wednesday, May 05, 2010
Stella Maris College
One of my things to do this May is to check out the schools around Dalaya for Bell. I am very excited to see my prospect school:
- JCSGO Christian Academy
- Stella Maris College
- Blueridge
- Roosvelt
This morning, I went to this school -Stella Maris College which is a private, Catholic, learning institution run by the Franciscan Missionaries of Mary. It is located in Cubao, Quezon City, Philippines. Established in 1955, it was once a school for girls but now accepts boys in its grade school and high school department.
Because I know that this school was established a long ago, i assume that the teachings here and the environment is very friendly and accommodating to parents who would like to inquire or just check out the school.
However, I was very dismayed to what I experienced sa kanilang lady guard na mukhang boy. I asked the tomboy guard kung san pwedng mg-inquire and she said,I have to bring the requirements needed for enrollment bago mg inqiure. So, Nabadtrip na naman ako, kasi kaya nga ako nagpunta para mg inquire hindi mag enroll! Ayaw ko nmn maging bastos ulit kaya s kanya nalng ako nagtanong dahil ayaw ong masayang ang punta ko. Then after a whille umalis na din ako ng walang napala.
AS i was walking away from the school, naisip ko na sayang lng tlga ung punta ko at hindi nmn ung guard ung ipinunta ko dun. So bumalik ako at humingi ng mga papers na I can read on pag uwi ko. pero ubos n daw. Pati listahan ng tuiton naubos na. tlgang nagalit n naman ang laman laman ko. Nghintay pa ako ng matgal para lng sa wala. Isa p nmn un sa mmga pinaka-ayaw ko.
This time, umalis na talaga ako but befoe I made my exit, tinanong ko muna ung name ng tomboy guard. sabi nya, "veronica"...
kakaloka siya, ang ganda p nmn ng name niya. Pinainit niya lang ang ulo. After i made my exit tumwag ako sa telephone number na nkita sa table ng guard. Sinumbong ko sya dun sa Ms. MEl na nakausap ko.
Super turn-off. Ayaw papasukin ang mga magulang n mgiinquire. Dalhan ko sila ng bomba! nakakabwisit. Hay naku, tintest nnmn ang patience ko. Kainis. Napaiyak pa ako sa galit kanina sa phone habnag kausap ko ung Ms. MEl.
To you ms. VEronica ng Stella Maris, Ayusin mo trabaho mo! Hindi ka lng bsta guard dyan! Ikaw ang unang tingin sa skul na binabantayan mo! Ganache ka!
May 9, 2010 is Mother's Day
I saw an ad about MOther's Day sa Manila Bulletin last Sunday, April 25, 2010. It was a contest in honor of our beloved mother for the coming MOther's Day. The first one was "Looking like MOm" and the other is "Wonder Wo-MOm".
I wanted to join so I checked on some of my recent pictures with Bell that I think we look a like. I even made a poll question sa Facebook, asking if magkamukha ba tlga kmi ni Bell. THe result says 100 percent yes so, it kind of encouraged me more to join. THey will be choosing 3 winners and the pictures will be published on May 9, 2010 sa Manila BUIlletin. The winning entries will also receive a Mothers day package.
On the other hand, the 2nd contest was about why do you think you have a wonder wo-mom. The entry sender should be one of the children of the mother. You have to send an essay explaining why you have a wonder wo-mom and attach a picture of your mom as well. I know for myself that I am not so good on writing so I assigned my sister to make the essay entry and I will put her name as the entry sender. They will choose only one winner for this and will get a mothers day package as a prize.
Deadline for submission of entries is on May 6, 2010 at 5pm.
I have selected the pictures that I will send the day after I read the article. My sister who is assigned to do the 100 word essay finished it just yesterday, May 4, 2010. It was a long wait for me but I kept on reminding her about that. I wanted to win kasi para gift nmin un kay mom. But when I was at the POst office, sabi after two days pa mkkkarating ung mail nmin dun kahit na sa Intramuros lng naman ung destination. So May 7 na un.
Naubos bigla ung energy ko sa sinabi ni ate sa Psot Office but still i mailed it, kasi natatakan na daw. I paid the mail and walked home na lang. Sobrang nkakalungkot ung sinabi ni Ate.
If only my damn super relaxed sister finished it on time, hindi siguro nasyang ang effort ko! pinaframe ko nlng sna ung mg pictures n pinadala ko.
Super nkakainis. Hay naku. Kahit anong sbhin ko nmn sa kanya napakabagal nya tlga kumilos at hindi nya alam ung word na 'deadline' at 'hurry'.
I just wish madiscover n nya nag gusto nya tlgang mangyari sa kanya. Dahil sa lhat n lng ng bagay wala syang care, at nkakaperwisyo na sya.
Damn it. galit na galit tlga ako.
HAppy MOther's Day to me and to mom!
I wanted to join so I checked on some of my recent pictures with Bell that I think we look a like. I even made a poll question sa Facebook, asking if magkamukha ba tlga kmi ni Bell. THe result says 100 percent yes so, it kind of encouraged me more to join. THey will be choosing 3 winners and the pictures will be published on May 9, 2010 sa Manila BUIlletin. The winning entries will also receive a Mothers day package.
On the other hand, the 2nd contest was about why do you think you have a wonder wo-mom. The entry sender should be one of the children of the mother. You have to send an essay explaining why you have a wonder wo-mom and attach a picture of your mom as well. I know for myself that I am not so good on writing so I assigned my sister to make the essay entry and I will put her name as the entry sender. They will choose only one winner for this and will get a mothers day package as a prize.
Deadline for submission of entries is on May 6, 2010 at 5pm.
I have selected the pictures that I will send the day after I read the article. My sister who is assigned to do the 100 word essay finished it just yesterday, May 4, 2010. It was a long wait for me but I kept on reminding her about that. I wanted to win kasi para gift nmin un kay mom. But when I was at the POst office, sabi after two days pa mkkkarating ung mail nmin dun kahit na sa Intramuros lng naman ung destination. So May 7 na un.
Naubos bigla ung energy ko sa sinabi ni ate sa Psot Office but still i mailed it, kasi natatakan na daw. I paid the mail and walked home na lang. Sobrang nkakalungkot ung sinabi ni Ate.
If only my damn super relaxed sister finished it on time, hindi siguro nasyang ang effort ko! pinaframe ko nlng sna ung mg pictures n pinadala ko.
Super nkakainis. Hay naku. Kahit anong sbhin ko nmn sa kanya napakabagal nya tlga kumilos at hindi nya alam ung word na 'deadline' at 'hurry'.
I just wish madiscover n nya nag gusto nya tlgang mangyari sa kanya. Dahil sa lhat n lng ng bagay wala syang care, at nkakaperwisyo na sya.
Damn it. galit na galit tlga ako.
HAppy MOther's Day to me and to mom!
Tuesday, May 04, 2010
Upadates on Things to Do
I have 2 things to add:
So, since it will be my first time, I think I will be wearing them as both necessity and fashion accessory that is why I have to choose very wisely and nicely on my looks and face.
I have three options of frames that really looks good on my face. My only problem is that I dont know what to choose because I can only buy one for myself (I am not a rich kid who can have everything I want to). My options were:
About my teeth, my mom said they are now impacted. Whatever it is, I just dont like it. I dont like my teeth scattered around inside my mouth. medyo nkakabawas sa self esteem. Kaya dun sa mga taong nahihioya sa teeth nila, I feel for you guys..hehe
- Get an eyeglass
- Visit a dentist
So, since it will be my first time, I think I will be wearing them as both necessity and fashion accessory that is why I have to choose very wisely and nicely on my looks and face.
I have three options of frames that really looks good on my face. My only problem is that I dont know what to choose because I can only buy one for myself (I am not a rich kid who can have everything I want to). My options were:
- Max Studio Whhite rimmed with color black
- Pepe Jeans Black and Pink with etch on the side
- Lulu Guinness horn rimmed glasses na black, parang cats eye look
About my teeth, my mom said they are now impacted. Whatever it is, I just dont like it. I dont like my teeth scattered around inside my mouth. medyo nkakabawas sa self esteem. Kaya dun sa mga taong nahihioya sa teeth nila, I feel for you guys..hehe
Monday, May 03, 2010
One of my habits is making a list. Lagi kasi akong nakakalimot. Kaya sinusulat ko lahat.
So for this month of May. These are my things to do:
good luck to me.
So for this month of May. These are my things to do:
- Verify membership and apply for an SS ID
- Claim Bell's Baptismal Certificate
- Check out schools around Dalaya for Bell
- Visit Divisoria
- Upadate Philhealth Member Record
- Get a Student Driver's License
- Lose weight
good luck to me.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
its been 6 months. haha.
still no maid. pero ngaun i made a choice. i told mom my plans dis year.
guess what she preferred me to do..PLAN B. it was a shock to me that she chose that. i mean, i know that i was the one who planned it, maybe i just wasnt prepared mentally about it. Its a big sacrifice again. I'll be one yr behind again. 2 batches will be graduating agin ahead of me. damn.
On the Bright side. i was able to help mom to save. more time to bell. more time to think about things. i can concentrate on myself.
On the Dark Side. i'm suppose to be gaduaing this school year. bell shud be in school next yr, wen i'm 3rd yr college and were the hell will get the means for that. i'm gaining a lot of weight here at home.
GrrRrr. bkit kc d p kmi mgkaron ng maid. hindi aq mkagalaw. i feel stuck.
still no maid. pero ngaun i made a choice. i told mom my plans dis year.
PLAN A - to enroll this sem and be an irregular HRM loser student.
PLAN B - I will not enroll dis sem only and be back to school by 2nd sem to enroll all my back subjects so dat i'll be a regular 3rd yr student again.
guess what she preferred me to do..PLAN B. it was a shock to me that she chose that. i mean, i know that i was the one who planned it, maybe i just wasnt prepared mentally about it. Its a big sacrifice again. I'll be one yr behind again. 2 batches will be graduating agin ahead of me. damn.
On the Bright side. i was able to help mom to save. more time to bell. more time to think about things. i can concentrate on myself.
On the Dark Side. i'm suppose to be gaduaing this school year. bell shud be in school next yr, wen i'm 3rd yr college and were the hell will get the means for that. i'm gaining a lot of weight here at home.
GrrRrr. bkit kc d p kmi mgkaron ng maid. hindi aq mkagalaw. i feel stuck.
Saturday, December 01, 2007
no maid drama
kpagod. haggradness.. pti s pgpsok tintamtad aq. ayaw qng mgreklamo kc i cant focus on my studies. nauubos oras ko plagi kay bell khit nkktanggal ng stres kso i also have responsibilities skul which is hndi ko maxado nggawa n xang ngpapasad skin. aun lng. i dont know how to resolve dis. but i hope for some help and support so dont i wont feel sad and down.
ayaw kong malau kay bell and i also dont want to stop my schooling.
anybody, please help.
ayaw kong malau kay bell and i also dont want to stop my schooling.
anybody, please help.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
OCTOBER. i want it over.
OCTOBERFEST.
its mid of october already. Sembreak is ON and DEADLINES are OFF! wo0ho0.
everybody is drinking 'til drunk.
but not for me.
just before my finals started, evrything turned into not-supposed-to-be. my bo0 was shocked with what she knew about me which made her change her mind like a snap. our maid na npkatanga ay lumayas. my bro whose already a drop out and is always nowhere to be found.
all these are up on my mind bugging me the week before my finals which made me out of focus on lots of things and resulted to a 'bahala na' decision making evryday. i dont know what to prioritize. But thank God. finals is over even if i know that it was just a mess for me! i answered them all like i just dont care anymore and puro hula mga sagot ko. sa true or false, i answered dem all TRUE. sa mltiple choice nmn, khit anong letter nlng bsta may sagot. haha. i know its not good. pero u can't blame me, i was out of focus and cant help my mind to go back on track. all the crisis at home are up to me plus my own dilemma equals stupid me!
about my dilemma.. i still cant think coz i dont know what to think about it. no peace of mind. so i just act like i dont care but deep inside i always think of her even if i know she's not feeling the same way that i do. i just want to clear out things but then if time tells it shoudn't be then i dont have a choice. i believe in destiny and only God knows.
for u.. i know that u dont care anymore but still i just want to say this. i miss you and i love you. but if this love doesnt deserve you then i dont have a choice. u still dont know me yet and that little thing that you knew that hitted you so hard and made things change upside down is just a piece of whats the real me, so wat more if u'll knew the real me?!...dont you remember you told me u love me? or maybe u love only the things u see on me but not the things inside me?! i dont want you to go. i also dont want to ruin your band's faith and trust wd each other but i want you to think about u've sed ALREADY!
its mid of october already. Sembreak is ON and DEADLINES are OFF! wo0ho0.
everybody is drinking 'til drunk.
but not for me.
just before my finals started, evrything turned into not-supposed-to-be. my bo0 was shocked with what she knew about me which made her change her mind like a snap. our maid na npkatanga ay lumayas. my bro whose already a drop out and is always nowhere to be found.
all these are up on my mind bugging me the week before my finals which made me out of focus on lots of things and resulted to a 'bahala na' decision making evryday. i dont know what to prioritize. But thank God. finals is over even if i know that it was just a mess for me! i answered them all like i just dont care anymore and puro hula mga sagot ko. sa true or false, i answered dem all TRUE. sa mltiple choice nmn, khit anong letter nlng bsta may sagot. haha. i know its not good. pero u can't blame me, i was out of focus and cant help my mind to go back on track. all the crisis at home are up to me plus my own dilemma equals stupid me!
about my dilemma.. i still cant think coz i dont know what to think about it. no peace of mind. so i just act like i dont care but deep inside i always think of her even if i know she's not feeling the same way that i do. i just want to clear out things but then if time tells it shoudn't be then i dont have a choice. i believe in destiny and only God knows.
for u.. i know that u dont care anymore but still i just want to say this. i miss you and i love you. but if this love doesnt deserve you then i dont have a choice. u still dont know me yet and that little thing that you knew that hitted you so hard and made things change upside down is just a piece of whats the real me, so wat more if u'll knew the real me?!...dont you remember you told me u love me? or maybe u love only the things u see on me but not the things inside me?! i dont want you to go. i also dont want to ruin your band's faith and trust wd each other but i want you to think about u've sed ALREADY!
"Forgiveness is a promise, not a feeling"
When u forgive other pipol, u're making a promise not to use their past sin against them.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
SINGLEhood.. pleasure!**
by: LYRA MURRO
TOO often people want what they want, or think they want at the moment, which is usually "happiness" right now. The irony of their impatience is that only by learning to wait, and by willingness to accept the bad with the good do we usually attain those things that are truly worthwhile. I have a blessing which is sometimes seen as a curse. I am blessed with the gift of being single.
For most of us single people it seems the world has already come up with its own set of expectations on how we should live life. The world expects us to finish school in our early twenties, get a job, find the love of our lives by the time we reach our mid-twenties, marry and have kids. But the thing is, not everyone sees their dreams come true in the same way.
For most of us, being single will be more of a phase than a final destination. This is the best place to practice the art of contentment. Someday, I'm sure most of us will fall in love and get married. But the thing is, love will always be tested. Someone more handsome, more charming, richer, funnier, sweeter would come along. If you have not practiced the art of contentment as a single person, chances are you would be tempted to want that and not cherish your chosen one.
Practicing the Art of Contentment as a single person means that you take what life gives you, good or bad, you're willing to see it through. It means you don't walk away every time things get tough because it builds in you patience, perseverance, understanding and a hundred different virtues that people in a hurry will never have. Being single means you would find how it feels to be alone thus, allowing you to cherish every moment you spend with your chosen one. The art of contentment means you wouldn't mind if life had to make you wait for so long to find the love of your life, because you know that the waiting would only make the finding much sweeter.
Being single is a time of your life when you can get to know yourself better. You can pursue different interests and passions without having to ask another person's approval. It is a phase when you can keep focus on other things, discover your potentials and talents, and see yourself become more than what you expect to be. Allow yourself to surprise you. Stop wasting precious energy trying to figure out why you're still romantically unattached. It's all in the mind. Take the time to go see your friends, spend time with your family, do charity work and you will realize that you are not, and never for one moment, was alone. Try to get to know yourself first before you try to get to know other people. To be truly loved means to be known and accepted for who you are. How do you expect other people to know you and to love you, when you don't know who and what you really are?
Sometimes the dilemmas we face are not between what is absolutely bad and absolutely good. Sometimes, it's between good and best. Treat this stage of your life as a phase to evaluate who is good for you and who is best for you. Sometimes, you won't hear music, or feel magic to know who's best for you. The heart just knows and it doesn't need any romantically charged scenario to decide on the matter.
Trust in your heart, and trust that time will eventually lead you to, not to the perfect partner, but to the most suitable partner for you. Being single is a phase of life that we need to be thankful for. Well, that was what the old school wanted us to believe in. Married life is a path most of us would take, however, it is not the only path there is. Relieve yourself of the pressure and stop making every single, straight guy friend a prospect. You have no business "entrapping" them and asking (which is more like "putting a gun in the head") them of their exclusive attention, if you're not ready for commitment yourself. Sometimes, when you spend too much time trying to find a boyfriend, you normally end up marrying the first loser who comes to your door. Take your time, the world will wait. Being married doesn't guarantee that it will make your life happy. It doesn't guarantee anything at all. Sometimes, it only brings two miserable people together only to make their life even more miserable. Without the right intention, the emotional maturity, financial security and of course, unwavering love, you're better off unattached.
Don't put your life on hold for Mr/Ms. Right but don't let it waste away with Mr./Ms Wrong. Life is about things that you do and happen to you everyday. It's not about the things that could have happened but never did, or things that you think would happen in the future. Live life now! Live it to the fullest and stop beating yourself up, trying to be perfect on a Saturday night date. Allow life to surprise you with it's most wonderful blessings.
TOO often people want what they want, or think they want at the moment, which is usually "happiness" right now. The irony of their impatience is that only by learning to wait, and by willingness to accept the bad with the good do we usually attain those things that are truly worthwhile. I have a blessing which is sometimes seen as a curse. I am blessed with the gift of being single.
For most of us single people it seems the world has already come up with its own set of expectations on how we should live life. The world expects us to finish school in our early twenties, get a job, find the love of our lives by the time we reach our mid-twenties, marry and have kids. But the thing is, not everyone sees their dreams come true in the same way.
For most of us, being single will be more of a phase than a final destination. This is the best place to practice the art of contentment. Someday, I'm sure most of us will fall in love and get married. But the thing is, love will always be tested. Someone more handsome, more charming, richer, funnier, sweeter would come along. If you have not practiced the art of contentment as a single person, chances are you would be tempted to want that and not cherish your chosen one.
Practicing the Art of Contentment as a single person means that you take what life gives you, good or bad, you're willing to see it through. It means you don't walk away every time things get tough because it builds in you patience, perseverance, understanding and a hundred different virtues that people in a hurry will never have. Being single means you would find how it feels to be alone thus, allowing you to cherish every moment you spend with your chosen one. The art of contentment means you wouldn't mind if life had to make you wait for so long to find the love of your life, because you know that the waiting would only make the finding much sweeter.
Being single is a time of your life when you can get to know yourself better. You can pursue different interests and passions without having to ask another person's approval. It is a phase when you can keep focus on other things, discover your potentials and talents, and see yourself become more than what you expect to be. Allow yourself to surprise you. Stop wasting precious energy trying to figure out why you're still romantically unattached. It's all in the mind. Take the time to go see your friends, spend time with your family, do charity work and you will realize that you are not, and never for one moment, was alone. Try to get to know yourself first before you try to get to know other people. To be truly loved means to be known and accepted for who you are. How do you expect other people to know you and to love you, when you don't know who and what you really are?
Sometimes the dilemmas we face are not between what is absolutely bad and absolutely good. Sometimes, it's between good and best. Treat this stage of your life as a phase to evaluate who is good for you and who is best for you. Sometimes, you won't hear music, or feel magic to know who's best for you. The heart just knows and it doesn't need any romantically charged scenario to decide on the matter.
Trust in your heart, and trust that time will eventually lead you to, not to the perfect partner, but to the most suitable partner for you. Being single is a phase of life that we need to be thankful for. Well, that was what the old school wanted us to believe in. Married life is a path most of us would take, however, it is not the only path there is. Relieve yourself of the pressure and stop making every single, straight guy friend a prospect. You have no business "entrapping" them and asking (which is more like "putting a gun in the head") them of their exclusive attention, if you're not ready for commitment yourself. Sometimes, when you spend too much time trying to find a boyfriend, you normally end up marrying the first loser who comes to your door. Take your time, the world will wait. Being married doesn't guarantee that it will make your life happy. It doesn't guarantee anything at all. Sometimes, it only brings two miserable people together only to make their life even more miserable. Without the right intention, the emotional maturity, financial security and of course, unwavering love, you're better off unattached.
Don't put your life on hold for Mr/Ms. Right but don't let it waste away with Mr./Ms Wrong. Life is about things that you do and happen to you everyday. It's not about the things that could have happened but never did, or things that you think would happen in the future. Live life now! Live it to the fullest and stop beating yourself up, trying to be perfect on a Saturday night date. Allow life to surprise you with it's most wonderful blessings.
Monday, October 15, 2007
antipolo escapade.
haha.
after all my kadramahan nagwa ko png takasan c norma at mgliwaliw wd my bebe n my sakit.
saturday afternoon around 2pm, ashley arrived at home. chill lng hanggang sa dumating n ung ryt time pra tumakas. haha.
so off we go to queen's place. chill agen for an hour den off to antipolo.
super ginaw. kaia aq ngksakit ngaun. so aun, pinatulog ko n ang bebe ko den todo kain n kmi after. haha. den konting beer. games. cards. laugh trip. swimming. tapos tulog na!
sunday na. ang aga nmin ngcing. kain agen tapos chill. super init kc tska antok p kming lhat. after lunch swimming n kmi while working on some drinks on the side! hahaha.
c bell nkijoin n din. swimming agad nung sunday den after ng sleep mna xa tapos swimming ulit ksma kming lhat n ngddrinks sa side. saya! tinapon ko xa sa pool pra mawla sipon nya to make her feel better. infarenss, effective! haha.. nasuka nya dn ung mga phlegm nya, which is good. so wen we got home na, she felt a lot better na.
thank God for that!
ate smyl. happy bday, super sya ng weekend. khit my konting sabit. ilorveu. pahugg!
after all my kadramahan nagwa ko png takasan c norma at mgliwaliw wd my bebe n my sakit.
saturday afternoon around 2pm, ashley arrived at home. chill lng hanggang sa dumating n ung ryt time pra tumakas. haha.
so off we go to queen's place. chill agen for an hour den off to antipolo.
super ginaw. kaia aq ngksakit ngaun. so aun, pinatulog ko n ang bebe ko den todo kain n kmi after. haha. den konting beer. games. cards. laugh trip. swimming. tapos tulog na!
sunday na. ang aga nmin ngcing. kain agen tapos chill. super init kc tska antok p kming lhat. after lunch swimming n kmi while working on some drinks on the side! hahaha.
c bell nkijoin n din. swimming agad nung sunday den after ng sleep mna xa tapos swimming ulit ksma kming lhat n ngddrinks sa side. saya! tinapon ko xa sa pool pra mawla sipon nya to make her feel better. infarenss, effective! haha.. nasuka nya dn ung mga phlegm nya, which is good. so wen we got home na, she felt a lot better na.
thank God for that!
ate smyl. happy bday, super sya ng weekend. khit my konting sabit. ilorveu. pahugg!
OCTOBERFEST.
its mid of october already. Sembreak is ON and DEADLINES are OFF! wo0ho0.
everybody is drinking 'til drunk.
but not for me.
just before my finals started, evrything turned into not-supposed-to-be. my bo0 was shocked with what she knew about me which made her change her mind like a snap. our maid na npkatanga ay lumayas. my bro whose already a drop out and is always nowhere to be found.
all these are up on my mind bugging me the week before my finals which made me out of focus on lots of things and resulted to a 'bahala na' decision making evryday. i dont know what to prioritize. But thank God. finals is over even if i know that it was just a mess for me! i answered them all like i just dont care anymore and puro hula mga sagot ko. sa true or false, i answered dem all TRUE. sa mltiple choice nmn, khit anong letter nlng bsta may sagot. haha. i know its not good. pero u can't blame me, i was out of focus and cant help my mind to go back on track. all the crisis at home are up to me plus my own dilemma equals stupid me!
about my dilemma.. i still cant think coz i dont know what to think about it. no peace of mind. so i just act like i dont care but deep inside i always think of her even if i know she's not feeling the same way that i do. i just want to clear out things but then if time tells it shoudn't be then i dont have a choice. i believe in destiny and only God knows.
for u.. i know that u dont care anymore but still i just want to say this. i miss you and i love you. but if this love doesnt deserve you then i dont have a choice. u still dont know me yet and that little thing that you knew that hitted you so hard and made things change upside down is just a piece of whats the real me, so wat more if u'll knew the real me?!...dont you remember you told me u love me? or maybe u love only the things u see on me but not the things inside me?! i dont want you to go. i also dont want to ruin your band's faith and trust wd each other but i want you to think about u've sed ALREADY!
its mid of october already. Sembreak is ON and DEADLINES are OFF! wo0ho0.
everybody is drinking 'til drunk.
but not for me.
just before my finals started, evrything turned into not-supposed-to-be. my bo0 was shocked with what she knew about me which made her change her mind like a snap. our maid na npkatanga ay lumayas. my bro whose already a drop out and is always nowhere to be found.
all these are up on my mind bugging me the week before my finals which made me out of focus on lots of things and resulted to a 'bahala na' decision making evryday. i dont know what to prioritize. But thank God. finals is over even if i know that it was just a mess for me! i answered them all like i just dont care anymore and puro hula mga sagot ko. sa true or false, i answered dem all TRUE. sa mltiple choice nmn, khit anong letter nlng bsta may sagot. haha. i know its not good. pero u can't blame me, i was out of focus and cant help my mind to go back on track. all the crisis at home are up to me plus my own dilemma equals stupid me!
about my dilemma.. i still cant think coz i dont know what to think about it. no peace of mind. so i just act like i dont care but deep inside i always think of her even if i know she's not feeling the same way that i do. i just want to clear out things but then if time tells it shoudn't be then i dont have a choice. i believe in destiny and only God knows.
for u.. i know that u dont care anymore but still i just want to say this. i miss you and i love you. but if this love doesnt deserve you then i dont have a choice. u still dont know me yet and that little thing that you knew that hitted you so hard and made things change upside down is just a piece of whats the real me, so wat more if u'll knew the real me?!...dont you remember you told me u love me? or maybe u love only the things u see on me but not the things inside me?! i dont want you to go. i also dont want to ruin your band's faith and trust wd each other but i want you to think about u've sed ALREADY!
"Forgiveness is a promise, not a feeling"
When u forgive other pipol, u're making a promise not to use their past sin against them.
i miss you.
i miss someone asking me where i am
i miss someone bugging me at night
i miss someone missing me
i miss someone wanting my hug
i miss someone wanting me beside him
i miss someone who cares for me a lot
i miss someone remingding me how special i am
i miss being important to someone.
i miss someone bugging me at night
i miss someone missing me
i miss someone wanting my hug
i miss someone wanting me beside him
i miss someone who cares for me a lot
i miss someone remingding me how special i am
i miss being important to someone.
Thursday, September 20, 2007
whew. its been five months since i've been hir.
i miss my blog. or maybe i just have to let go of whats on my mind.
damn. i miss the feeling of being loved. loved by someone who likes and loves you the way you are. loved by someone who is willing to take risks just to be with you or just simply to see you even if you don't see him. loved by someone who knows everything in you. loved by someone who is honest of his flaws. loved by someone whom u can be with anytime even if u both have nothing to do. loved by someone who feels mad when u r sad. loved by someone who cheers u up when ur down. loved by someone who shares evrything he has even if it is his last. *sigh*
sounds cheesy but true.
fuck.
i miss my blog. or maybe i just have to let go of whats on my mind.
damn. i miss the feeling of being loved. loved by someone who likes and loves you the way you are. loved by someone who is willing to take risks just to be with you or just simply to see you even if you don't see him. loved by someone who knows everything in you. loved by someone who is honest of his flaws. loved by someone whom u can be with anytime even if u both have nothing to do. loved by someone who feels mad when u r sad. loved by someone who cheers u up when ur down. loved by someone who shares evrything he has even if it is his last. *sigh*
sounds cheesy but true.
fuck.
Saturday, April 21, 2007
ur killing me.
still cant forget the lie she did. she doesnt know that i knew she lied to me. no second thoughts! she has changed. maybe she did it,just like i did before. sweet revenge it is for me, coz i know its working.
my question is, why revenge? am i not worth it. what else do i need to give up to show you that youre more imporatnt.
if u cant be with him while m around, then fine. no problem with me. i just dont know why you have to reason out when things are bout him. if this is your revenge, then ill accept.
but how will i know? im scared of asking you. m scared of loosing you more than loosing ur partner as my frnd. and honestly, i feel like you dont care about me anymore. just like revenge! damn it. talk to me.
i just cant take this any longer and if another lie will happen again and is about him.
anything that happens once will never happen again, but anything that happens twice will surely happen for a third time.
my question is, why revenge? am i not worth it. what else do i need to give up to show you that youre more imporatnt.
if u cant be with him while m around, then fine. no problem with me. i just dont know why you have to reason out when things are bout him. if this is your revenge, then ill accept.
but how will i know? im scared of asking you. m scared of loosing you more than loosing ur partner as my frnd. and honestly, i feel like you dont care about me anymore. just like revenge! damn it. talk to me.
i just cant take this any longer and if another lie will happen again and is about him.
anything that happens once will never happen again, but anything that happens twice will surely happen for a third time.
Thursday, April 19, 2007
revenge?
i proved her that our friendship is more important even if know it was to0 late. but i did my best. i chose her from the other choice that i know will truly make me happy but i refused, just to show her that she's more valuable for me.
maybe, my best wasnt d best for her. i know for myself, i did a lot of shit on her! pero pinagsisihan q n un. dat's why i gave up my happines for her own happiness, that's how much i treasure her,, i hope she'll find d reality in all my sacrifices. i just don't know if she's seeing it or was just not able to see or was not interested to see.
a lie that she did for the 1st time to me really hitted me badly.
i dont know what to say or to react. i just thought that maybe she's trying to d same thing that i did her before na sobrang pngcchan ko p rn that's y m now suffering n still sacrificing.. or maybe der's another rison, i just dont know y she lied.
i have no problem weder where she likes to go with or without me, i just cant take the fact that she really lied!
i tried to ask her frankly, but i was scared.. scared of bka mgkagulo nnmn.
maybe this is just the right consequence for wat i did to her b4..but that's not her, n i know it!
m so confused, can't think of nything else but the issue.
mahal, do u have any problem wd me?! please, tell me.
ur bein' missed a lot!
m doin' best to not disappoint u, i dont know wat ur thinkin'.. i felt a gap between us since d text issue. please speak ur mind.
love u. take care.
maybe, my best wasnt d best for her. i know for myself, i did a lot of shit on her! pero pinagsisihan q n un. dat's why i gave up my happines for her own happiness, that's how much i treasure her,, i hope she'll find d reality in all my sacrifices. i just don't know if she's seeing it or was just not able to see or was not interested to see.
a lie that she did for the 1st time to me really hitted me badly.
i dont know what to say or to react. i just thought that maybe she's trying to d same thing that i did her before na sobrang pngcchan ko p rn that's y m now suffering n still sacrificing.. or maybe der's another rison, i just dont know y she lied.
i have no problem weder where she likes to go with or without me, i just cant take the fact that she really lied!
i tried to ask her frankly, but i was scared.. scared of bka mgkagulo nnmn.
maybe this is just the right consequence for wat i did to her b4..but that's not her, n i know it!
m so confused, can't think of nything else but the issue.
mahal, do u have any problem wd me?! please, tell me.
ur bein' missed a lot!
m doin' best to not disappoint u, i dont know wat ur thinkin'.. i felt a gap between us since d text issue. please speak ur mind.
love u. take care.
Sunday, April 08, 2007
HAPPY EASTER!!
happy easter to all of guys..
hope u we're all able to reflect on all of your sins this holy week.
truly GOD is powerful and merciful, that's why he died for all of our sins.
HE LOVES us all.
So if u think ur alone, think TWICE, 'coz ever since HE didn't left you..maybe u did.
THINK about it.
hope u we're all able to reflect on all of your sins this holy week.
truly GOD is powerful and merciful, that's why he died for all of our sins.
HE LOVES us all.
So if u think ur alone, think TWICE, 'coz ever since HE didn't left you..maybe u did.
THINK about it.
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
mahal,
Cguro nga may MG ako.. kaw lng nkakaintindi skin palagi,..ngaun, cguro pagod k na kakaintindi skin, pero d kita masisisi, at hindi din kita minamadaling makalimot at gad dun sa nangyare. Pero gusto ko lng sbhin sau na, sana walang mgbago sa closeness ntin.. npka corny man pkinggan, pero d ko nmn alam kung pano hindi pacornihin eh. Wag sanag mgbago ang turin mo skin gaya ng pgbbago mo kay dada dati nung hindi xa nkpunta sa bday mo dhil may pinuntahan xang iba..
Hindi ko n din alam kung pano iexplain ang sarili ko sau, pero cguro kung wala ka hindi q maiisip ang mga kagagahan ko, ayaw kong mgbitiw ng salita n I will promise something to prove to you na sincere at sobrang pinagsisisihn ko ung ginwa ko sau, cguro sa iba ngagawa ko un ng matagalan pero marealze ko iba sila sau, mas nafeel ko ung luv mo skin at hindi ang luv with concern.. more dan friends less dan lovers nga dba?! Kso as of d moment d ko alam kung ganun k p rin skin..
Naiintndhan ko din nmn kung bkit hindi ka ngsasalit maxado ng nsa isip mo dhil ganun k nmn tlga, kso kung anu-ano tumtakbo sa utak ko, d q alam kung ano tlga ang gusto mong sbhin skin,.
Mahal, honestly, I feel guilty, and I think that’s worth it enough as your revenge skin.. your kindness kills me! Sobra.
Aaminin ko may gusto ako kay rhen, crush ko n xa nung una ko xang nkita, kso hinsi ko lng maamin sa sarili ko, d q alam kung bkit,. Den nung nlaman ko na parang ngiging close n kau nung umpisa p lng, tinigilan ko n ung nafifil ko, kso nung cnabi nya na my gusto xa skin, parng bumalik ung nafifil ko na prang gusto ko din xa, hanggang sa ngkagulo n.. npa-expect ako sa knya mula nung cnabi nya un khit n alam kong hindi dapat. Nging self-centered ako sa nafifil ko at hindi kita inisip, pero hindi naman ako nging ganun all d time, alam mo yan.. tinry kong lumayo pra wag ng maulit ung una kong pagkakamali. Pero parang d more n palagi ko xang nkikta, lalo akong ngfafall hindi ko lng inaamin dhil bka mgkagulo nnmn.. ayaw ko ng maguluhan ka kc alam kung sinasarili mo lhat,
Nung araw na ngtext ako sa knya n mgkksma tau, ngwa ko un dhil ngeexpect ako na may something nga between us, kso after din nun tska ko lng nalaman na gaguhan lng pla. Nahurt din ako xempre pero mas nasasaktan at naasar ako dhil ang tanga ko dhil sana inamin ko n lng nung una pa para hindi nging gnito. Nsaktan tuloy kita na dapat ay hindi!
Mahal.. I lorve u. alam mo yan! Maybe I got the guts of doing it from my feeling of lack of affection and satisfaction in life kasi nga hindi ako dapat gnito! Ung ntrarabaho kasi my anak n ako lng lhat. Kso eto na, hindi ko na mbblik pa. I was just so blinded by candy at hindi ko nkikita ang mga blessings sa paligid ko.
Narealize ko n un lhat, kso nga lng medyo late na.. pero dba better late than never.
Hope u understand mahal even if it’ll take you time to do so. Hindi ko rin gustong sirain kaung dlawa n candy just to get what I expect to have. Kaya nga hindi ko inamin ung feelings ko kc ayaw kong masira ang happiness mo wen ur wid him. Cguro nga expectation lng ung lhat skin!
M sori mahal, pingsisihan ko n ‘tong lhat, maniwala ko man o hindi.
Lorve u always. At khit klan n u nid me khit sang bagay d2 p rin ako 4 u! nothing will change! Hope u won’t change too!.
Hindi ko n din alam kung pano iexplain ang sarili ko sau, pero cguro kung wala ka hindi q maiisip ang mga kagagahan ko, ayaw kong mgbitiw ng salita n I will promise something to prove to you na sincere at sobrang pinagsisisihn ko ung ginwa ko sau, cguro sa iba ngagawa ko un ng matagalan pero marealze ko iba sila sau, mas nafeel ko ung luv mo skin at hindi ang luv with concern.. more dan friends less dan lovers nga dba?! Kso as of d moment d ko alam kung ganun k p rin skin..
Naiintndhan ko din nmn kung bkit hindi ka ngsasalit maxado ng nsa isip mo dhil ganun k nmn tlga, kso kung anu-ano tumtakbo sa utak ko, d q alam kung ano tlga ang gusto mong sbhin skin,.
Mahal, honestly, I feel guilty, and I think that’s worth it enough as your revenge skin.. your kindness kills me! Sobra.
Aaminin ko may gusto ako kay rhen, crush ko n xa nung una ko xang nkita, kso hinsi ko lng maamin sa sarili ko, d q alam kung bkit,. Den nung nlaman ko na parang ngiging close n kau nung umpisa p lng, tinigilan ko n ung nafifil ko, kso nung cnabi nya na my gusto xa skin, parng bumalik ung nafifil ko na prang gusto ko din xa, hanggang sa ngkagulo n.. npa-expect ako sa knya mula nung cnabi nya un khit n alam kong hindi dapat. Nging self-centered ako sa nafifil ko at hindi kita inisip, pero hindi naman ako nging ganun all d time, alam mo yan.. tinry kong lumayo pra wag ng maulit ung una kong pagkakamali. Pero parang d more n palagi ko xang nkikta, lalo akong ngfafall hindi ko lng inaamin dhil bka mgkagulo nnmn.. ayaw ko ng maguluhan ka kc alam kung sinasarili mo lhat,
Nung araw na ngtext ako sa knya n mgkksma tau, ngwa ko un dhil ngeexpect ako na may something nga between us, kso after din nun tska ko lng nalaman na gaguhan lng pla. Nahurt din ako xempre pero mas nasasaktan at naasar ako dhil ang tanga ko dhil sana inamin ko n lng nung una pa para hindi nging gnito. Nsaktan tuloy kita na dapat ay hindi!
Mahal.. I lorve u. alam mo yan! Maybe I got the guts of doing it from my feeling of lack of affection and satisfaction in life kasi nga hindi ako dapat gnito! Ung ntrarabaho kasi my anak n ako lng lhat. Kso eto na, hindi ko na mbblik pa. I was just so blinded by candy at hindi ko nkikita ang mga blessings sa paligid ko.
Narealize ko n un lhat, kso nga lng medyo late na.. pero dba better late than never.
Hope u understand mahal even if it’ll take you time to do so. Hindi ko rin gustong sirain kaung dlawa n candy just to get what I expect to have. Kaya nga hindi ko inamin ung feelings ko kc ayaw kong masira ang happiness mo wen ur wid him. Cguro nga expectation lng ung lhat skin!
M sori mahal, pingsisihan ko n ‘tong lhat, maniwala ko man o hindi.
Lorve u always. At khit klan n u nid me khit sang bagay d2 p rin ako 4 u! nothing will change! Hope u won’t change too!.
candy,
feb 10, saturday..wala kming mgwa ni mahal kaya sabi ko kay kuya quin dalhin nya kmi dun sa ipapakilala nya sakin na ikaw pala un..
nung nkita n kita, sbi ko sa sarili ko
"zhet! ang ganda nya kung gurl xa..hehe"
tapos sumakay ka sa car, hindi ko alam kung anong sasabihin ko pero kinakabahan talga ako nun. den hinintay k nmin kc sabi mo liligo ka lng kso ang tagal mo nmn. ngpunta tau ng padi's, nabanggit n kuya quin n ex mo daw pla c fae, na-shock ako nung una pero aus lng.. wala akong ginawa nun kundi tumitig sau ng d mo alam. after nun hinatid k nmn sa inyo pero b4 p nun ngpunta muna tau kila fae ÜÜ hehe..
pgbaba mo ng car, crush n kita! kaso d q maamin sa sarili ko. tinanong ako nila she at mahal kung type b daw kita o hindi.. kso hindi ako ngreact.. tapos sbi ni mahal..
MAHAL: mahal, ano ayaw mo? cute nmn xa ahh, kc kung ayaw mo akin n lng xa..
ILDZ: hindi ahh, wala akong sinabi n ayaw ko.(nka-smile)
feb 12
nsa skul ako, yosi break muna kaya dinaanan ko c mahal sa rum nya..ngkwento xa about sa nstp nya..den sabi nya ngpunta xa sainyo ksma c kuya quinn, nagulat ako kc bakit ganun, tapos may pinuntahan pa daw keo at pinanood nyo ung sunset.. d ko alam kung anong dpt kong mafeel nung kinuwento nya un, basta quiet n lng ako kc mukhang masay nmn c mahal.. kya pinabayaan ko n lng na kaung dalwa n ung mg get in touch 2gder.
feb 15
textmates na keo. pinapunta k nya sa bhay para sumama smin d whole day.. kinuha ntin ung boots ko den ung gown den balik sa bhay nmin.. tapos punta sa ust para sunduin ang iba nming frnds tapos kila queen nmn tau ngpunta para kumain saglit tapos sa practice nmn ng sayaw k nmin dinala.. during these times wala lng skin kung ano mang meron between u n mahal..ng panggap k p ngang pinsan ko kc hindi k pa kilala sa bahay nila mahal, dba?! hehe.. hanggang sa bahay k n nmin natulog..
feb 23
ngkita tau ulit ksma mo c fonzy.. hinatid nyo ako sa bahay pati sa skyan ng bus ppntng Laguna.. ang kulit p nga n fonzy, ayaw n akong paalisin, kc delikado daw..hehe kso makulit ako, kaya wala xang ngawa.
feb 27
nguguluhan n c mahal seo kc parang wala k nmng pakialam s knya. tapos sinabi mong my gusto ko n din skin pero nililigwan mo xa. honestly, na gulat ako! pero d feeling is mutual tinatago ko lng dhil mahal was expecting dat der was somethin' already between u two. kaya ngkunwarian n lng ako n wala akong naramdaman dun sa sinabi mo pero ang toto0, sobrang happy ako nung nalaman ko un..
nung cnabi ko kay mahal un, nasad xa.. sbi nya ok lng daw. pero alam kong hindi xa ok kc npa-expect n xa nung umpisa p lng, kya ako n ung lumayo..
pero ever since then hindi n nwala s isip ko un..
march 2
ÜÜ baha ng alak sa bhay mo! bday mo kc. hehe.. super excited n akong mkita ka ulit nun, hindi ko alam kung bkit. pgdating nmin sainyo, nashock kme sa dmi ng tao. pero aus lng masaya nmn eh. ang dami ngang hottie nung bday mo!hehe.hanggang inantok ako sa dami ng alak hanggang sa natulog na ako sa taas,.tapos.........
dun ko 1st time nkita c nick..hehe
march 4
my nkita si mahal sakin habang gumgwa ako ng avp para sa project..
MAHAL: ano yan?
ILDZ: (busy sa harap ng pc) alin?
MAHAL: yang nsa leeg mo? chikinini yan dba?!
ILDZ: huh? (shocked)
MAHAL: wag mo ng ideny? san at kanino galing yan?!
ILDZ: ano? (d alam sasabihin)
MAHAL: mahal! isa! knino nga?!
ILDZ: huh? mahal!!!!!
MAHAL: ano?!?!
ILDZ: mahal!! putang ina!!........
MAHAL: oh bkit??!
ILDZ: tangina mahal kay rhen!
MAHAL: huh?! ahh.. owkei. (sabay walkout)
medyo nagalit c mahal at d alam ssbhin sa narinig nyang cnabi ko. hanggang sa hindi n xa ngsalita, tapos bigla k pang tumwag sa celfone nya,.. after 1 hour lumapit skin c mahal tapos ngbati n kmi.. akala ko hindi na..hai..
march 5
1st time akong tnext ni nick!..wala lng.
march 7
last day ng rehearsals ko para sa dance concert, kso d n ako nkpunta kc ngpunta keo s bhay nmin ksma si nick, kya pumyag n ako..hehe, smin din keo natulog.. ng cut c mahal ng classes para maksunod sa bhay, 1st time q din c nick nksama nun.. hehe, wla lng.. den kinabukasan..
march 8
bday ko na!! hehe.. umuwi n din keo agad kc ang aga kung umalis dhil nga sa concert,. hinatid mo p nga aq sa gateway kc ang dami kong dala.,.hehe.. thnk u po.
march 9
kau n ni mahal.. d ko alam kung pano, bsta kau nlng bigla.. hai..
march 13
ngpunta kmi ni mahal sinyo, c nick lng ksma mo nun, kso umalis din xa ngpunta xa kila melody, tapos nginom tau,.. umalis ka at ntulog na pala,.. at kung anu-ano pa! waaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
dumtaing c kuya quinn para sunduin kmi, may amats kmi pareho ni mahal, as in sobra! c nick dumating nung pgkaalis nmin,.. tapos ngcing n lng ako nsa taxi n aq sa tpat ng compound nmin..
kinabukasan, tnxt ako n mhal nnwakaw daw ung mp4 nya sainyo.. hai,.sobrang nkakaloka ang araw na toh!
march 21
walang pasok c mahal, ngpunta kau ulit smin.,khit my exam ako.. walang inuman n nganap kc during exams ko andun keo sainyo..Ü kumakain ng pizza..
march 23
nginom kami smin, ktatapos lng kc ng exam ni mahal, ksma c zhe, anna, aq at c mahal lng.. sumunod kaung dalwa ni fonzy.. my amats din ako nun, at my ngwa nnmn akong d mganda! hai, lagi n lng.. may ngalit tuloy skin! hmp.
march 27
ksma ko c tor tska c kian..
march 31
ngpunta kmi ni mhal ulit sinyo.. dpat sa antipolo kmi kso ayaw ni kuya quinn bka daw mahuli kmi kc election season daw ngaun.. at xempre, dhil taung tatlo lng nun nginom nnmn tau..
ngtext ako, tapos nkiramdam c mahal, kaya hinram nya ung fone mu at aun!..haha! galit n xa skin! nung pauwi n kmi, kinuha o nya ug gamit sa sasakyan at inwan sa bhay mo, aq nmn si takbo para kunin at mkasakay n kso ayaw akong pasakayin ni mhal, ayaw akong iwan ni kuya quinn kaya nkasakay din ako at hintaid sa may kanto..
habang nsa car, may amats n c mahal, hindi mkausap ng matino, at halatang may galit n skin! kso d nya maiicip kung mggalit b xa o hindi!..
nung nkita n kita, sbi ko sa sarili ko
"zhet! ang ganda nya kung gurl xa..hehe"
tapos sumakay ka sa car, hindi ko alam kung anong sasabihin ko pero kinakabahan talga ako nun. den hinintay k nmin kc sabi mo liligo ka lng kso ang tagal mo nmn. ngpunta tau ng padi's, nabanggit n kuya quin n ex mo daw pla c fae, na-shock ako nung una pero aus lng.. wala akong ginawa nun kundi tumitig sau ng d mo alam. after nun hinatid k nmn sa inyo pero b4 p nun ngpunta muna tau kila fae ÜÜ hehe..
pgbaba mo ng car, crush n kita! kaso d q maamin sa sarili ko. tinanong ako nila she at mahal kung type b daw kita o hindi.. kso hindi ako ngreact.. tapos sbi ni mahal..
MAHAL: mahal, ano ayaw mo? cute nmn xa ahh, kc kung ayaw mo akin n lng xa..
ILDZ: hindi ahh, wala akong sinabi n ayaw ko.(nka-smile)
feb 12
nsa skul ako, yosi break muna kaya dinaanan ko c mahal sa rum nya..ngkwento xa about sa nstp nya..den sabi nya ngpunta xa sainyo ksma c kuya quinn, nagulat ako kc bakit ganun, tapos may pinuntahan pa daw keo at pinanood nyo ung sunset.. d ko alam kung anong dpt kong mafeel nung kinuwento nya un, basta quiet n lng ako kc mukhang masay nmn c mahal.. kya pinabayaan ko n lng na kaung dalwa n ung mg get in touch 2gder.
feb 15
textmates na keo. pinapunta k nya sa bhay para sumama smin d whole day.. kinuha ntin ung boots ko den ung gown den balik sa bhay nmin.. tapos punta sa ust para sunduin ang iba nming frnds tapos kila queen nmn tau ngpunta para kumain saglit tapos sa practice nmn ng sayaw k nmin dinala.. during these times wala lng skin kung ano mang meron between u n mahal..ng panggap k p ngang pinsan ko kc hindi k pa kilala sa bahay nila mahal, dba?! hehe.. hanggang sa bahay k n nmin natulog..
feb 23
ngkita tau ulit ksma mo c fonzy.. hinatid nyo ako sa bahay pati sa skyan ng bus ppntng Laguna.. ang kulit p nga n fonzy, ayaw n akong paalisin, kc delikado daw..hehe kso makulit ako, kaya wala xang ngawa.
feb 27
nguguluhan n c mahal seo kc parang wala k nmng pakialam s knya. tapos sinabi mong my gusto ko n din skin pero nililigwan mo xa. honestly, na gulat ako! pero d feeling is mutual tinatago ko lng dhil mahal was expecting dat der was somethin' already between u two. kaya ngkunwarian n lng ako n wala akong naramdaman dun sa sinabi mo pero ang toto0, sobrang happy ako nung nalaman ko un..
nung cnabi ko kay mahal un, nasad xa.. sbi nya ok lng daw. pero alam kong hindi xa ok kc npa-expect n xa nung umpisa p lng, kya ako n ung lumayo..
pero ever since then hindi n nwala s isip ko un..
march 2
ÜÜ baha ng alak sa bhay mo! bday mo kc. hehe.. super excited n akong mkita ka ulit nun, hindi ko alam kung bkit. pgdating nmin sainyo, nashock kme sa dmi ng tao. pero aus lng masaya nmn eh. ang dami ngang hottie nung bday mo!hehe.hanggang inantok ako sa dami ng alak hanggang sa natulog na ako sa taas,.tapos.........
dun ko 1st time nkita c nick..hehe
march 4
my nkita si mahal sakin habang gumgwa ako ng avp para sa project..
MAHAL: ano yan?
ILDZ: (busy sa harap ng pc) alin?
MAHAL: yang nsa leeg mo? chikinini yan dba?!
ILDZ: huh? (shocked)
MAHAL: wag mo ng ideny? san at kanino galing yan?!
ILDZ: ano? (d alam sasabihin)
MAHAL: mahal! isa! knino nga?!
ILDZ: huh? mahal!!!!!
MAHAL: ano?!?!
ILDZ: mahal!! putang ina!!........
MAHAL: oh bkit??!
ILDZ: tangina mahal kay rhen!
MAHAL: huh?! ahh.. owkei. (sabay walkout)
medyo nagalit c mahal at d alam ssbhin sa narinig nyang cnabi ko. hanggang sa hindi n xa ngsalita, tapos bigla k pang tumwag sa celfone nya,.. after 1 hour lumapit skin c mahal tapos ngbati n kmi.. akala ko hindi na..hai..
march 5
1st time akong tnext ni nick!..wala lng.
march 7
last day ng rehearsals ko para sa dance concert, kso d n ako nkpunta kc ngpunta keo s bhay nmin ksma si nick, kya pumyag n ako..hehe, smin din keo natulog.. ng cut c mahal ng classes para maksunod sa bhay, 1st time q din c nick nksama nun.. hehe, wla lng.. den kinabukasan..
march 8
bday ko na!! hehe.. umuwi n din keo agad kc ang aga kung umalis dhil nga sa concert,. hinatid mo p nga aq sa gateway kc ang dami kong dala.,.hehe.. thnk u po.
march 9
kau n ni mahal.. d ko alam kung pano, bsta kau nlng bigla.. hai..
march 13
ngpunta kmi ni mahal sinyo, c nick lng ksma mo nun, kso umalis din xa ngpunta xa kila melody, tapos nginom tau,.. umalis ka at ntulog na pala,.. at kung anu-ano pa! waaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
dumtaing c kuya quinn para sunduin kmi, may amats kmi pareho ni mahal, as in sobra! c nick dumating nung pgkaalis nmin,.. tapos ngcing n lng ako nsa taxi n aq sa tpat ng compound nmin..
kinabukasan, tnxt ako n mhal nnwakaw daw ung mp4 nya sainyo.. hai,.sobrang nkakaloka ang araw na toh!
march 21
walang pasok c mahal, ngpunta kau ulit smin.,khit my exam ako.. walang inuman n nganap kc during exams ko andun keo sainyo..Ü kumakain ng pizza..
march 23
nginom kami smin, ktatapos lng kc ng exam ni mahal, ksma c zhe, anna, aq at c mahal lng.. sumunod kaung dalwa ni fonzy.. my amats din ako nun, at my ngwa nnmn akong d mganda! hai, lagi n lng.. may ngalit tuloy skin! hmp.
march 27
ksma ko c tor tska c kian..
march 31
ngpunta kmi ni mhal ulit sinyo.. dpat sa antipolo kmi kso ayaw ni kuya quinn bka daw mahuli kmi kc election season daw ngaun.. at xempre, dhil taung tatlo lng nun nginom nnmn tau..
ngtext ako, tapos nkiramdam c mahal, kaya hinram nya ung fone mu at aun!..haha! galit n xa skin! nung pauwi n kmi, kinuha o nya ug gamit sa sasakyan at inwan sa bhay mo, aq nmn si takbo para kunin at mkasakay n kso ayaw akong pasakayin ni mhal, ayaw akong iwan ni kuya quinn kaya nkasakay din ako at hintaid sa may kanto..
habang nsa car, may amats n c mahal, hindi mkausap ng matino, at halatang may galit n skin! kso d nya maiicip kung mggalit b xa o hindi!..
gsto ko lng sbhin na gusto n din kita bgo p mging kau ni mahal, kso mas nauna
lng xang mgpakita, kaya pinabayaan ko n lng c mahal, kso d more n nkikita kita d
more n ngfafall ako, tinry kong pigilin pero d tlga maiiwasan minsan, cguro seo
wala lng.. pero wala n akong pakialam, gusto ko lng malaman mo ung side ko..
nhurt din ako nung tinanaong k ni mahal kung ano b tlga taung dlawa pero d n lng
ako ngpaapekto dhil alam kong wala din nmng patututnguhan. ..hai, tangina! ang
corny ko nah maxado, pero khit n corny na, tot0o lhat toh! maniwala k man o
hindi!basta, alagaan mo n lng ang mahal ko!
Saturday, March 17, 2007
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