OCTOBER. i want it over.

OCTOBERFEST.

its mid of october already. Sembreak is ON and DEADLINES are OFF! wo0ho0.

everybody is drinking 'til drunk.

but not for me.

just before my finals started, evrything turned into not-supposed-to-be. my bo0 was shocked with what she knew about me which made her change her mind like a snap. our maid na npkatanga ay lumayas. my bro whose already a drop out and is always nowhere to be found.

all these are up on my mind bugging me the week before my finals which made me out of focus on lots of things and resulted to a 'bahala na' decision making evryday. i dont know what to prioritize. But thank God. finals is over even if i know that it was just a mess for me! i answered them all like i just dont care anymore and puro hula mga sagot ko. sa true or false, i answered dem all TRUE. sa mltiple choice nmn, khit anong letter nlng bsta may sagot. haha. i know its not good. pero u can't blame me, i was out of focus and cant help my mind to go back on track. all the crisis at home are up to me plus my own dilemma equals stupid me!

about my dilemma.. i still cant think coz i dont know what to think about it. no peace of mind. so i just act like i dont care but deep inside i always think of her even if i know she's not feeling the same way that i do. i just want to clear out things but then if time tells it shoudn't be then i dont have a choice. i believe in destiny and only God knows.

for u.. i know that u dont care anymore but still i just want to say this. i miss you and i love you. but if this love doesnt deserve you then i dont have a choice. u still dont know me yet and that little thing that you knew that hitted you so hard and made things change upside down is just a piece of whats the real me, so wat more if u'll knew the real me?!...dont you remember you told me u love me? or maybe u love only the things u see on me but not the things inside me?! i dont want you to go. i also dont want to ruin your band's faith and trust wd each other but i want you to think about u've sed ALREADY!

"Forgiveness is a promise, not a feeling"

When u forgive other pipol, u're making a promise not to use their past sin against them.